Perfection
by PrincessRosa
Summary: Hermione desperately wants to change the way people perceive who she is. Rated for mild references to alcohol and general teenage behaviour!


**A/N: **This is just something I threw together in a day or two, I just really felt like writing again. Hope you enjoy it (: It's from Hermione's point of view and it's set in the Golden Trio's sixth year. I've kind of pretended that the drama happening in the sixth book wasn't happening and it was just another one of the books (:

**Edit: **Haha, fixed my mistakes in grammar and general wording. Sorry about them, by the way.

**Disclaimer: **J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter, not I.

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It was hard being perfect, and, unfortunately for Hermione Granger, she was as close to it as Hogwarts had gotten in a long time. She was the girl who never put a toe out of line, the princess of academic exams. Everything she did seemed to work perfectly for her, yet, when somebody else gave it a shot, they wound up in tears from the difficulty and stress of it all. So how did she do it?

She never seemed to crack under the stress, and she would only ever be seen crying when something had gone wrong with her friends – a highly normal thing for any teenage girl. Yet, she was the one doing everything – the girl who had been given a time-turner in her third year just so she could take extra subjects, unbeknownst to the rest of the school – and yet she kept the secret, the stress and the grades completely to herself. To the rest of the world, Hermione Granger was perfect.

However, the rest of the world didn't see Hermione when she was shut up in her bedroom at night, the silencing charm she'd recently cast around her four-poster bed in full swing while she cried uncontrollably for a few hours until she drifted off to sleep. The world didn't see her frantically transfiguring the area under her eyes every morning, so she'd always look like she'd slept like a baby. No, the world didn't see a lot of things. In fact, the world missed far too much for Ms. Granger's liking.

Hermione was sick of the way people stared in the hallways when she walked past – when she was with Harry and Ron (the Golden trio, as they'd been dubbed by the press), she was always able to reassure herself they were staring at Harry, the famous one. Nevertheless, Hermione had to walk alone sometimes, and that was when she was always conscious of the wary glances people shot her way. She wanted to cry out, scream that she wasn't who they thought she was! She wasn't perfect, she had her flaws – she wanted to be loved, just like anyone else, and yet while all the other girls told of how they were falling in love, Hermione was always overlooked.

She was sick of never getting a compliment about how she looked, sick of her high grades. She knew she had to break loose, free of all the binds that her reputation brought with it. She wanted to show the world that Hermione Granger had a sense of humour – that she knew how to smile, laugh and party, not just show the rest of Gryffindor house at another one of their many Quidditch parties. She wanted to show the whole student body, the teachers and all the other denizens of Hogwarts just how fun Hermione Granger could be.

She was just at a loss of what to do.

How could she show everyone how fun, how relaxed, and how _cool_ she was, without destroying the respect people had for her? She wasn't clever in thinking up things like this; it was something people like the Weasley twins were good at, and frankly, she was the equivalent of Percy Weasley at the moment. Sure, she'd always been recognised as one of Harry's confidantes, one of his gang. Yet, still, the boys had all the popularity, the girlfriends, the fun, and what did she have?

Grades.

Hermione was worried about feeling so daring and misunderstood – sure, she knew she wanted everything Ron and Harry had, but she didn't want to abandon her schoolwork or the respect she had gained from teachers through long years of hard work. She wanted to break loose, but finally, she decided she'd do it slowly. Pace herself, like she had through everything else.

So, she started wearing eye-makeup in the mornings, and a touch of lip gloss, yet soon enough, the girls were making such horrid comments she'd stopped even that tiny change. "No, I don't have a boyfriend. No! I don't have a crush!" Didn't anybody understand that she was changing herself for her?

She'd either have to think an infallible plan up fast, or recruit other girls to help her, and that would be a nightmare for sure. It wasn't that Hermione didn't have girlfriends, no, not at all, she actually did, though some of the people who were sure she only hung around with Harry and Ron would be surprised, but the girls who would be best at helping her would be girls like Lavender or Parvati, silly air-headed bimbos who thought that flashing boys was ladylike. No, Hermione needed to think, and she needed to think fast.

So, Hermione did what she did best. She went to the library to think. A half-hearted smile and raise of the hand was all the greeting she managed to give Madam Pince before scurrying anxiously to the back of the library. Amongst the books that no student ever bothered to check out she sat down, knowing that she wouldn't be disturbed while she sat there to think and write notes down in a tatty little notebook she'd had since first year.

As the hours wore on, Hermione eliminated option after option – until she was left with two choices. She could go to one of the many huge parties being held in the room of requirement, drink quite a bit to prove she could, and kiss some boys and generally muck around, or she could host her own party in the room of requirement and make it a bash nobody would ever forget. After worriedly glancing between the two options for nearly an hour, she decided that the second option would be her best one. She'd take care of inviting all the Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws, and would get a few of her friends in Ravenclaw to invite a few Slytherins (seeing as they were the house on best terms with them). That way, she'd have a lovely mix of people at her party, and would know most, if not all of the people there. It was probably better that way.

So she set to planning her inter-house gathering, or rather, as she liked to see it, as her time to prove herself. She wrote down all the food she'd want, the drinks (which, against her better judgement were mostly all alcoholic. The guests were going to all be above fifteen, after all), and, with difficulty, the guest list. While many of the guests were Gryffindors, she had a large amount of Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws invited, and had placed small asterixes next to select names of Ravenclaws whom she knew would invite the more mild Slytherins, who, she had decided would receive a small note asking them to invite a few Slytherins who they thought were great at a party.

As the weeks drew on, and April arrived, she knew that people would start getting concerned about exams soon, and so, despite her usual studious demeanour, she studied the same amount as Ron or Harry and worked on her party plans in secret the rest of the time. It was stressful, and regardless of the fact that she knew she was clever enough to easily pass all her exams with remarkable results, the stress of _not_ studying was getting to her.

"Are you alright 'Mione?" Ron asked her one evening at dinner between stuffed mouthfuls, "You haven't been studying as much as you usually do for exams."

"Perfectly fine thanks Ronald. Just peachy." She'd snapped, though she had regretted it afterwards. Of course her friends became frustratingly perceptive just when she wanted them to not notice her – it wouldn't have happened at any other time. Harry in particular became annoyingly nosy. He sat with her every single evening and she caught him trying to read over her shoulder a few nights.

"Harry, is there any reason my diary interests you so much all of a sudden?" she'd asked with icy coolness. He went bright red when he realised he'd been trying to read her private thoughts.

"Sorry Hermione. I didn't realise. It looked to me like you were planning something. You sure it's a diary?"

"Of course I am. Just because I write my diary with a bit more pizzazz than most girls doesn't mean it's a plan. It's a diary."

Nearly two weeks after those disastrous events with her friends, she was done with the planning. She walked up to the room of requirement one evening after dinner, telling Harry and Ron that she needed the bathroom and wouldn't be long to the tower. Harry had told she and Ron how to get into the room a while back, and, if she remembered correctly, she had to think exactly what she wanted to see, and so, she drew out her notebook from a pocket inside her robes and read the little speech she'd written in there three times. She knew a door would appear, but it still surprised her when it popped up out of nowhere, and so, with a deep breath, she entered the venue of her party.

It was fantastic! Large and roomy, the room had transformed itself into a high-ceilinged room akin to a ballroom, easily large enough for her guest list. Colourful streamers lined the walls and roof, and balloons were all over the room. A long table lined the right-hand wall, with paper plates and cups scattered delicately over it. No food was there, but she had known that she'd have to rely on the house-elves (the horror!) for that part of her plan. A large music player sat in the far left corner, and as Hermione hadn't the money or the contacts to get a live band (though really, how could one get a live band into Hogwarts for a private, and quite secret, party? With difficulty, no doubt) she'd settled for manual music. Stacks of records were surrounding the music player, and she planned to let anybody who wanted change the music whenever they wanted, so that nobody ever got bored. Really, after she chose an outfit and sent out the invites, everything would be _perfect_.

Subsequently, Hermione had to get working to get the invites out in time for the party (she'd decided on May the third, allowing people time to talk about it before exams and not be too exhausted before they started on the thirteenth.) and speak to the kitchen staff. She chose paper in a creamy colour for the invites, and had sixty done before the twenty eighth. She charmed ribbons into pretty bows, and began passing them round to people during classes, giving the chosen Ravenclaws four extra invitations each (all blank, so anybody could come), allowing for sixteen extra people. Then, she sent a list down the house elves, asking them for all the food she wanted and sent owls to Hogsmeade to order the drinks. The elves were delighted to help, and agreed to send up some elves to the correct floor forty minutes before the party started, so Hermione could meet them there and carry it all inside.

After the invitations were out, more buzz started to surround her, and she was met with two excited, but slightly sad friends who felt that they could have helped her plan it. "Don't worry you guys, I had my reasons. You'll see what I mean when you get to the party." With that, she went upstairs and started charming the few dresses in her trunk to more suitable lengths and colours for her bash. Cleverly, in true Hermione fashion, she'd written on the invitations that it was a 'pre-exam' party, so she could effectively get rid of a lot of the interest on why she was holding it, and also prove that she didn't have a stick up her bum before all exams.

All too soon the first of May came, and then the stress really hit her. She was visiting the Room of Requirement more than three times daily to make sure it was still perfect, and frantically logging the RSVPs she'd received. The elves, who shared her enthusiasm for the party, didn't share her stress, and day by day Hermione was becoming more and more worried that a teacher would find out about the party and the sneaky fact there was alcohol and a huge amount of students going. Ron and Harry kept patting her on the back and reassuring her it would all go smoothly, and even Ginny had stepped up to the task of calming Hermione down. "It's going to be great Hermione! Come on, loads of people are going. And Luna told me that she knows loads of the Ravenclaws are excited. Besides, it should be Slytherin free, right?" Ginny laughed.

"Not exactly Gin. A couple of the Ravenclaws are inviting some Slytherins. I'm not sure who exactly, but don't worry. The really bad ones aren't liked by any except their own house, right?" Ginny's face said it all.

Thankfully, Ginny wasn't a gossip, and everyone else was too busy making sure they'd look good and have good dates to the party to care who was going. Hermione was reassured by smiles and waves as she walked through the halls on the third, and the hushed whispers of "See you there!" along with thumbs up did stay her nerves a bit. At seven o'clock, Hermione ducked out of Gryffindor tower dressed for the party to go meet the elves. She'd picked up the booze that weekend and had already stowed it in the Room of Requirement, and now wanted to make sure the food would be laid out nicely. Her hair was in a laid back up-do, smooth and silky especially for her special night. Dressed in a daringly short hot pink mini-dress with killer black heels, she looked spectacular. She met up with the elves quickly and a few of them offered to help carry dishes in, and marvelled at the sight of her venue.

Smiling nervously, Hermione put on a brave face while she waited for eight o'clock to arrive. Everyone knew where it was, and Harry and Ron were bringing a bunch of Gryffindors with them, so she wouldn't be alone for much longer. She'd propped the door slightly open so it would be easy to get into, and was just smoothing out her dress anxiously when somebody knocked on the door. She peeked round to see Luna, Ginny and a bunch of other people outside, and they came in with huge grins on their faces and not one of them failed to tell her how great the party looked like it would be. Turning the music on, the night started to get going, more and more people arriving after eight.

Ron and Harry definitely had the best reactions. "Great party Hermione!" Harry had shouted over the music, while Ron wormed his way across the dance floor and gave her a hug before saying "Looks like you've executed something else better than anyone else could have!" Hermione only laughed and joined everybody who had started to dance. Hermione was a little nervous though, because she'd been told not all the Slytherins who'd been invited had arrived yet, and she wasn't sure who exactly she was still expecting.

Throwing away her fears she smiled seductively and ran onto the dance floor to join the other girls in a remix of a popular Weird Sisters song, and nearly everybody was either dancing or eating when she heard the door close. It was such a distinct noise that she'd grown so accustomed to, she knew that it wouldn't have closed unless everybody had arrived, and so she smoothly slipped off the dance floor to greet her new guests.

"Malfoy?" was all she could spit out.

Who, in Merlin's name had thought it would be a good idea to invite her, Harry and Ron's arch-nemesis? Ravenclaws were supposed to be smart, after all.

"Granger," Draco sneered. "You can close your mouth. We know we look good." He smirked as he gestured to the group of less than mild Slytherins who'd just appeared. "Looks like everyone's having a good time, hey? We'll see if it lives up to a real party before we judge you." He smirked, and then they broke out and moved through the crowd.

"Bollocks!" Hermione muttered as she ran a hand through her hair, furious with herself for trusting anybody with anything to do with the guest list.

It wasn't long before Draco and Harry had started insulting each other, and despite many, many different people's attempts to break up the two boys, they soon began to hit each other. Hermione was at a loss of what to do. If she had to go in there and break them up, she'd just be her old spoil-sport self, but if she didn't, somebody could get hurt. Gradually they were separated by some seventh years, but not before Harry had broken glasses and a cut lip, and Malfoy a black eye. Things seemed to get awkward after that, and it wasn't long after Malfoy had stormed out of the room that all the others thanked her for the party, gave her weak smiles and began to leave. Less than five minutes later, the music was off, and she was alone with Ron.

She couldn't help it, she burst into tears. It was just so typical that something so trivial as people not getting along would ruin the party. Her party. The party that she was supposed to show everyone how great and fun she was. She ran over to Ron and wailed into his shoulder, makeup streaming down her face and into his jacket. "Everything went wrong! I was," sniff "going to show everyone how fun I was and how great a party I could throw!" sniff "But everything went wro-o-ong!" She howled. Ron put his arms around her and sighed.

"Hermione, you clearly don't understand. Everyone knows you're fun. Everyone thinks you're cool. Nobody doubted that you could throw a fantastic party. Only you couldn't see it." He said softly, hugging her towards him.

"See what?" she sniffed.

"That you were already perfect in every single way." He said exasperatedly, smiling as he swept a lock of hair out of her watery eyes. "You're too harsh on yourself 'Mione, you need to loosen up." And with that, he kissed her.

Hermione couldn't have imagined a better end to her party. It wasn't her first kiss, nor was it Ron's, but it was no doubt the best kiss she'd ever had. Everything was, well, perfect.

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**A/N: **Well, I hope you liked it. I had fun writing it, and hope you had fun reading it. If you'd be so kind, review, if not (: Ah well. Thanks for reading anyways (:


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